It's my hips. Isn't it?

So this is pretty funny/embarrassing. Last night, I was over at my Gram's house hanging with the fam and I started talking about how I really need to lose 5lbs, not because I think I'm over weight but because none of my clothes fit. The other morning I was dressing for work and I actually zipped my muffin top into the side of my pants. Can you imagine the frustration??! Well gram gave me some words of wisdom, "Honey your body is changing and it's preparing you for children" My fucking hips are spreading? Seriously...I wanted to jump off the back deck. I'm devastated because first off I can't even get a boyfriend let alone having to worry about getting knocked up. Why can't this traumatic metamorphosis wait until I'm married and actually considering shoving a small human out of me? Well as if that wasn't bad enough, I got drunk off of that bottle of chardonnay I was talking about yesterday and texted an ex-boyfriend "Gram and Beebs just told me that the only reason I don't fit into my old pants is because my hips are becoming child bearing. Wow. I need all new clothes" -He never answered, ever. Like not even today. Not sure what I was thinking but hey, I just wrote about it in a blog so it's pretty much out there now.

I posted this picture because I don't think my camera will show the product clearly on me.

Moving on. Urban Decay STARDUST completely distracted me from my body issues. This stuff is on point- a must have item for spring/summer. Like I can't even believe I only bought one shade... It costs $20 and it comes in a really cool container that you just squeeze the sides and it opens up. It's like shimmer on roids but like still so subtle and sexy. I bought the shade "Space Cowboy" this powder eyeshadow is perfect for day to night. I wore it to the office today with just mascara to keep it minimal. On the flip side, I did my aunt's eye make-up last night using it and gave her sexy bedroom eyes. She was prepping to meet up with her asshole ex-boyfriend and she obviously needed to look slutty and awesome. Wallow. So yeah it's pretty much a super versatile eye shadow, I believe they advertise the product with a slogan along the lines of...no crazy glitter, just pretty shimmer. It is totally worth the drive to Sephora or whatever local retailer you might use that carries Urban Decay. And as a side note, let me just say that UD makes amazing eye shadows across the board. Their palettes, to single shades have perfectly pitched pigment and are long wearing. I highly recommend this line for all eye shadows.
Now I'm going to go running... Xo S

Spring has sprung: get your man to do the same.

Spring is all about fresh starts and horny teenagers on prom night. Love is in the air honey, and although the only thing my lips will be touching tonight is the bottle of chardonnay in my refrigerator, I  have higher hopes for you! In going with the theme of the season I thought to myself, "what would be better than to slough off my dead winter skin and give my make-up bag a little lift?" I ran into Sephora today to accomplish this because I currently do not have a face scrub. First off let me just say that the Sephora store at Colonie Center has the worst customer service. Some lady stopped in asking one of the sales associates for a Clarins lipstick, the associate was baffled by the question and was actually going to try and find the product. I had to intervene. Sephora doesn't even carry Clarins make-up line. Yes, I know they have Clarins skincare but like hello?! I don't work at Sephora and I knew enough to tell the woman to go to Macy's down the hall. This is a classic example of how some make-up saleswoman cannot be trusted (and how Sephora will give any kid an after school job). I just went off on a tangent but I needed to get that off my chest, it completely horrified me.

Anyway, I ended up finding (on my own) an unbelievable scrub from Ole Henriksen. Ole is one of my favorite skincare lines because the products smell amazing, are effective and also all natural. Think of it like a high-end Burt's Bees. I just used the scrub and it completely smoothed out my face and gave me a sweet glow. Okay so, I was super psyched with the product from Ole however, I have to say if you are looking for a comparable facial scrub for about half the price try Burt's Bee's Peach and Willow Bark Facial Scrub. The one major benefit of the Ole scrub is that it seems to have more emollients, but the Burt's is a great value and is just about on par.

Here is a picture of the scrub followed by what I look like right now after using it:

My eyebrow are red. I need to get them fixed, I know.

I would say it gave me an obvious glow and maybe even made my skin more even?? All in all it was totally worth the $24 and I can't wait to use it routinely during the summer months.

If you're lucky enough to be crawling under the sheets with someone tonight may I suggest a quick and inexpensive way to exfoliate on the fly: SEA SALT! Grab a couple of handfuls of coarse sea salt from the kitchen and become one with it in the shower. I know you can mix it with other things like olive oil etc. but really you can use it alone. I also find that my skin absorbs moisturizer better and it seems to hold it in longer.

Now go get some ;) Xo S

Anchor down!

Often overlooked and underrated, are a woman's eye brows. Sure, maybe you stop in for a wax here and there but what most woman are really missing is that eye brows literally ANCHOR your face. After years of pouring over facebook pictures, and always left feeling like "Cute! Minus my left eyebrow that's running off the page.." or "Why do I look like Piper from Charmed?" I realized how well groomed and perfectly placed eye brows alter your whole look.

Different eyebrows styles from famous woman. Each brow has given way to a signature look.

Now the good news is it doesn't take much to achieve a nicely manicured brow. I use three simple steps in the morning and in turn my eyebrows which are uneven and sparse become balanced.
What you need:

A brow pencil: make sure is has a nice waxy texture to it to hold the hair in place.
A brow brush: typically the brow brushes have the lash comb on the other side and they are cheap, under $6 at the drug store
A brow gel: I have a cheap Ardell brow gel that I bought for $3 at Sally.

If you're going to spend the money anywhere spend it on the pencil. For women with lighter brows (think Blake Lively) Chanel makes a eyebrow liner called "Taupe" and it is the bomb. Lighter brows tend to be more tricky than darker so I would definitely test any product before you buy.
I am currently using Sephora's eyebrow pencil which runs for $12.
If you're a rich bitch and can spend $30-$40 on eyebrow pencil's go for Anastasia's line which is available at sephora and sephora.com she truly has the best products for brows that I have come across thus far.
Once you have filled in your spots and evened out your brows with the pencil (and it may take a few attempts and possibly looking like Bert before you get it right) brush them out with your brow brush and then hold in place with gel. All in all it takes about as much time total as it does to put on 4 coats of mascara and it honestly makes a world of a difference.

Now I'm going to do something which I will probably regret: 

Your attempt at subtlety is appalling.

Well for my first post I thought I would re-cap St Patricks Day, and what a day it was! I'm pretty much in heaven if I can get hammered and still be in bed by 9 giving me a good night's rest. Here I am outside at a local Irish jaunt (guzzling a BL platinum), and of course I spot my most recent former flame. Obviously, my stunning good looks and painted on tight white pants made him extremely uncomfortable with his decision to dump me. He gave me a wave, ran himself in a circle of confusion, and then took to a full sprint out of the bar. Like if it wasn't awkward already, you just had the most dramatic reaction possible. Subtlety clearly isn't his strong point, however I have found that BLANC DE CHANEL is subtlety at it's finest.